Gay: Recently, GilSteinlauf, a senior rabbi of Adas Israel in Washington, DC, one of the largest conservative movement-affiliated synagogues came out as gay.
Soon after Apple, CEO, Tim Cook, announced he was gay. One blogger wrote, “You don’t just leave your wife to”go be gay any more than you would resign her to go be straight.” Another wrote, “Apple has lost its pioneering skills and sought more businesses.”
Fortunately, Rabbi Gil Steinlauf and Tim Cook both have financial anchors, bridges, a solid foundation, and retractable vessels that can weather the storms and bypass rough tides, and maybe unlike Michael Sam, an openly gay player who was cut by two National Football League (NFL) teams for being gay, but some will argue with others differently.
Does one need a prerequisite to come out as gay? I asked. The gay community stories are bigger than these two men, despite the media attention. Fortunately, for many wealthy and prominent people, publicly announcing their sexuality often increases wealth and power. However, this story is not about the rabbi or Tim Cook.
The other seldomly told stories:
Many less fortunate gays, lesbians, bisexuals, and transgender; do not have speedboats to escape tides or community captains and pirates ready to throw them over the board.
Today, many are trapped by their location under an ancient colonial doctrine, an ongoing fight for acceptance seeking an anchor or shield from a rough tide. These are beautiful places many visit for a vacation break or check in with family members and reconnect with one’s heritage.
These luscious greenery, breathtaking sunsets, and blue water symbolize a liberated vacation for many visitors, but outside their villas and hotel rooms, victims are routinely teased, bullied, and even killed from ignorance – even by ‘straight’ perpetrators who may have their struggles with homosexual tendencies, as studies have shown.
Despite the beauty and the warmth of the local people where the sunshine as if it never sets, it remains a delicate dance for inclusion. For some, homophobia roars like the ocean, damaging any objects in its path without an anchor. These unchecked anti-waves have eroded several impoverished and developing regions.
Inside the LGBT community, there are several reports of an increase in murders since 2010. Youth and young adults between the ages of 18 and 30 years old were 2.41 times as likely to experience physical violence.
Many parents also experience discrimination for giving birth to gay children and are more worried today about social stigma and hostility than their future. The hostility has created safety concerns, a sense of feeling guilty and hopeless, and often result in abuse, homelessness and death. The lack of resources, and access to medical care, support also has forced expulsion from their community.
The only visual representation of a voice mail or iTunes maybe the sound from the broken sewer pipes dripping and hovering over their heads from living under decayed bridges. Being gay is not a sin or learned behavior, but bigotry, intolerance, and atrocities against them are.
“All people deserve to live with dignity and respect, free from fear and violence regardless of their gender and sexual orientation” – an excerpt from a proclamation by President Obama on May 29, 2015, at an LGBT pride event.
The Human Rights Watch has noted an increase in violence simply for being perceived as a gay person,a nd if these communities do not provide the support, and laws to protect, their future for being gay remains grim.
(One) — Rupert. Shortly after he had come out, his church memberships and choir receded. He seldom goes to the beach anymore. Few friends’ lives cut short as a barbaric treatment against them appeared now acceptable. Repeatedly denied entry to community activities, employment, and forced to move for their safety. Few burned alive, stoned, and scorned.
(Two) — Sonia dressed like a man, with brittle hair, cargo pants, and boots, although she has found comfort in maintaining the small town floral garden. While some visitors marveled at her floral garden designs, others abused her appearance and hurled rocks at her. Being gay did not limit her imagination.
I wonder if a few had taken the time to know her, perhaps one would learn that friends of own dad repeatedly raped her as a child at a local bar from men he trusted. With nowhere to turn for support, her trust in men eroded, and she became isolated. Even in her death, after she had lost her battle with breast cancer, they treated her remains as if her gayness had Ebola disease. Her ashes now resting in the garden she designed.
(Three) —Burma, exquisite, and has an excellent job. She blends in well with her peers, lives in a pleasant home, and is well educated. However, she is also terrified of coming out. Despite rumors, after they identified her holding hands with her partner on the other side of town, she constantly shrugged off the argument of why she does not have a child at her age.
An umbrella still looking for the right shades:
Despite US Attorney General Eric Holder’s announcement: “I am pleased to announce the federal government will recognize same-sex marriages”, combined with new laws passed in over 20 states, polarization, intolerance, and political ideology threatens this fundamental change.
Though the gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender community ships and planes have ultimately reached many shores, others are still searching for that elusive lighthouse for guidance off these shores. Today’s violence along the shores is not simply because of poverty alone, but decades of unresolved social issues, where even if some offender has been a victim, they are scarce resources for treatment and accountability. Reporting crime should not put victims at more significant risk.
A blinded history
According to a study conducted by Trevor Bernard, based on data are taken from St Andrews Jamaica, marriage patterns between 1666 and 1750 taken from the parish register were analyzed.
The results showed that the average length of marriage was extremely limited and declined. It resulted in a reduction of children produced by marriage and did not sustain slavery and population growth. During that period, influxes of women slaves from and Africa arrived in the region.
It seems valid if people stayed married four centuries ago, and produced more children; it would have supported the demands for labor. Centuries later, independence has caused more social and economic struggles, as residual footprints in customs, laws, beliefs until now encounter the ghosts of the past.
Recently, the Jamaica Gleaner reported on an anti-gay march in St Thomas in response to a proposed bill that would recognize marriage as an official union between two people and not the traditional man and woman.
Some 150 years later, several Jamaicans opposed amending, the Buggery Act that was created during colonial rule around 1861.
Today, many leaders in the region remain silent on amendments or new human rights laws. The anti-gay protesters believe that homosexuals and their agenda are bad for strong and healthy families, righteousness, and justice.
What if those colonial rulers saw homosexuality as a threat to their business model and created those laws?
The gay, lesbian, and transgender community spend an estimated $830 billion according to Curve Magazine each year. Given its influence, especially along blue water and white sand, promoting more education, and other grassroots support is vital.
Some of these exclusive vacation spots globally cannot afford to avoid potential revenue, despite their position on the gay community.
The Advocate also noted that ‘with over 1.4 million LGBT business owners (and growing) the LGBT community earn its place at the table of economic opportunity with an input to the economy over $1.7 trillion, and an estimated 33,000 jobs.
Today, many people could have lived to their full potential thereby becoming famous stars, teachers, and police officers, but they were not welcome for being gay. Many left their communities to find comfort elsewhere living in the shadow.
The community strategically should not have to plan gay vacation routes based only on gay-friendly destinations in the Caribbean, Africa, or any other regions as if it is an election strategy targeting only your registered voters.
An elusive tide for change as the fight continues:
History also has shown the quest for equality does not sit comfortably with few on ideological grounds.
A recent report on YouTube by an Arizona pastor claiming that “we can have an AIDS-free world by Christmas if gays were executed.“If the god they all worship is love for all, who determines he does not love which one?
In 2010, the Cayman Islands rejected an Atlantis gay cruise. Prime Minister Kamla Persad-Bissessar says the “decriminalization of homosexuality” in Trinidad, and Tobago is not something her administration will seek to do because “it would not be prudent for the government to go ahead in that direction”, according to the Trinidad Express.
This I believe represents a culture of homophobia woven in decades of social-political and stigma to vanish sexuality and gender identity.
An intolerance system passed down from several decades is hard to change course instantly. Subconsciously, the Anglicization of families under British colonial rule centuries ago stays active today. However, some islands have taken steps, like Bermuda, Jamaica despite it un-anchored vessel to date, few other Caribbean and African nations have introduced measures for more tolerance, but advocate needs to keep the pressure on and hold elected leaders accountable beyond political promises.
Collaboration regardless of location, race culture and economic stratus.
Despite the statistical signs for more tolerance, this issue continues being a monumental task and these regions and it cannot achieve acceptance this alone. Only when societies become more educated and tolerant, then we can dance together and reverse a monster that was created. Pushing the legalization of marijuana, despite its potential long-term addictive effect, gay rights should take on the same effort.
Like fighting other racial issues, the gay community has to continue to fight for equality because while they dance to fun rhythms on the beach in these regions, many lyrics are strategically placed to demonize the community, like racial epithets, and codes used to polarize, create intolerance and hate.
The next time you power up your iPhone to spread hate, just recognize the new design you waited 24 hours in 10-degree weather to purchase. A gay man approved the designs.
And no! I am not gay, but should that matter to support their cause?
Changes take time and often resisted. Those communities must choose candidates who share their values
Rest in Peace • Leslie Feinberg- for fighting for equality for all.